In one of the sessions, a few months back, with Julie, the therapist, she asked me what was a good period in our relationship for me. I thought for a minute, and what came to me kind of surprised me. I told her that it was when I was pregnant with our first daughter. I had premature labor and had to stay in bed and on medication for three months. My husband looked after me and took care of the house. And then a few years ago, after I was in a car crash, and needed rest, he took care of me. It was interesting to me that “bad” times for me were “good” times in the relationship.
I’ve noticed that when I am down and out, he is more kind and attentive to me, but when I am happy and strong, he somehow seems to resent it. Even though he will say he wants me to be happy. And he would deny this paragraph if I tried to explain it to him.