What is a Soul Mate?

“During a recent conversation with a friend of mine, I was asked if I had found my soul mate and how did I know? The term soul mate is often used in relationships but I wonder if many people actually know what it really means. It might be easier to start by explaining what I think it isn’t. Being soul mates does not mean engaging in win-lose or lose-win relationships where one partner takes and never gives or gives and never takes. It is not expecting a partner to cater for all your needs while neglecting their own. It is love, respect, partnership but much, much more. So what is this elusive thing that everyone searches for and only a few find? It is not something you can label and date like a bottle of wine. It is a feeling and you instantly recognise it when it happens. When you move a relationship onto a higher level, building on love and respect as a foundation, you have the chance to experience one of the greatest things that can ever happen. A soul mate grows with you, allows you to develop while developing and growing with you. Soul mates do not accept win-win situations, a classic compromise, where one loses some things sometime and vice versa, they work together to find an even better solution. Soul mates put the partnership in first position and terms like envy, jealousy, conflict, dishonesty and hidden agenda are alien to them. This sounds like a perfect marriage vow but being a soul mate should not be confused with the daily grind of living together or the euphoria of a new love. Soul mates work hard every day to ensure that the relationship stays alive and vibrant. All sounds very technical but wait until you have that feeling when you know you have someone there that will stick with you through thick and thin, enjoying your successes with you, helping you through tough times and allowing you to do the same. It’s that feeling when spending time together brings on a feeling of ‘ teenager-like’ anticipation and excitement. It is knowing you are making plans together for now and the future and looking forward to spending the rest of your lives together living your dreams.”

by Dr. Nicholas Jenner

(Link to complete article)

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This entry was posted in covert abuse, emotional abuse, marriage, passive aggressive, passive aggressive behavior, relationships and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to What is a Soul Mate?

  1. Thank you for reposting!

  2. Soulmates… I think it’s a mere ideal… *sigh*
    But there’s something between a soulmate and a jerk, right?

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