This is the insanity of passive aggressive behavior. This is what leaves you scratching your head, wondering if you are crazy.
“I want you to have a beautiful house, but you can’t buy any paint to paint the walls.”
“I want you to have a beautiful garden, but you can’t buy any plants.”
“I want to make more money for you so you can afford to go to the doctor, but I am going to take time off of work to go to a wine tasting, and I am going to buy a ticket for you to go to a wine tasting even though wine makes you sick, and you will have to spend money to buy another ticket so you can take a friend along to the wine tasting.”
So, maybe it’s not controlling. Maybe it’s just crazy-making.