more on “Controlling?”

This is the insanity of passive aggressive behavior.  This is what leaves you scratching your head, wondering if you are crazy.

“I want you to have a beautiful house, but you can’t buy any paint to paint the walls.”

“I want you to have a beautiful garden, but you can’t buy any plants.”

“I want to make more money for you so you can afford to go to the doctor, but I am going to take time off of work to go to a wine tasting, and I am going to buy a ticket for you to go to a wine tasting even though wine makes you sick, and you will have to spend money to buy another ticket so you can take a friend along to the wine tasting.”

So, maybe it’s not controlling.  Maybe it’s just crazy-making.

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This entry was posted in covert abuse, emotional abuse, marriage, passive aggressive, passive aggressive behavior, relationships and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to more on “Controlling?”

  1. catherinetodd3 says:

    I actually heard this one (over and over again):

    “I want you to have a beautiful house, but you can’t buy any paint to paint the walls.”

    “I want you to have a beautiful garden, but you can’t buy any plants.”

    How did you know? So I’m not crazy after all? I have to get out NOW, and STAY OUT. That’s been the hard part for me. But with God’s Help I will. Amen!

    • Hi! Thank you for your comment! I finally figured out that he was passive aggressive when my brother showed my information on passive aggressive behavior in regards to the man my mom married after my dad died. Later I did more research on passive aggressive behavior and EVERYTHING I was reading fit my husband! NO, YOU ARE NOT CRAZY!!! For the longest time, I thought I was. Sometimes I still do. I doubt myself. A lot! But I keep going. I haven’t had the money – or the courage – to leave yet, but hopefully before too long, I will! Take good care of yourself!

      • catherinetodd3 says:

        Thank you… I can’t believe I lucked out and was able to LEAVE my “crazy-making” situation, but my problem has been that I keep going back! This year I decided no more. I would stay here at beautiful Lake Atitlan in gorgeous sunny Guatemala where I can afford to live, and I will be here “for the duration” (whatever that means).

        My husband can come once or twice a year and I am looking forward to that, or at least I was, but now I’m not so sure with the ridiculous obstructionist behavior that is going on in the states. The good thing in all this is (1) I can afford to leave and (2) I don’t have to go back and (3) there is the internet with all sorts of blogs and information and groups I can join in to find and and more than that, REMIND ME I’M NOT THE CRAZY ONE. And it’s all FREE! Everyone shares everything here and it’s such a life-saver, isn’t it?

        Thank you so much for your excellent and inspirational blog. It deserves the award you have!

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