Car crazy

A little background:  My older daughter, K,  is moving to another state next month to go to a university.  My younger daughter, J, will be starting college at the local community college.  J will be living at home and driving to college.

This “conversation” took place last night:

him:  I need to ask you something.

me.   O.K.

him:  What is J going to drive to college?

me:  The Saturn, just like K did.

him:  I was thinking of giving K the Saturn.

me: (silence)

I was already so tired emotionally from the day, from wanting out of this so badly, from feeling so stuck, from wanting to be loved, from a couple of things that happened in the evening that left me feeling crazy from p.a. stuff.  And now this.

For one thing, why couldn’t he have just said, we need to find a car for J because I am going to give the Saturn to K.  Actually, several months ago, I had asked him if we could give the Saturn to K and he refused.  (See this post.)

Another thing.   I’m not sure K still wants the Saturn.  It is starting to wear out and I don’t know if she is going to be up to handling car repairs.  I’m not sure how good the Saturn will be for her where she is going.  She has been car hunting on her own, since he refused to give her the Saturn.  Maybe she does want the Saturn and maybe it would work out fine for where she is going.  I just don’t know.

And if he does give her the Saturn and she does take it, what was he planning to do for J?  He initially wouldn’t give K the Saturn out of spite.  Now, is this spite towards J?

Me screaming here.  A co-worker had a car for sale.  Maybe I should ask him if it is still for sale and buy it for J to use, if K wants the Saturn.  This is so insane!

I was listening to Dave Ramsey yesterday and he was talking about parents providing food and reasonable clothes and reasonable entertainment and reasonable transportation and gas money and COLLEGE money for their children.  We haven’t saved college money for our children and I really, really regret that we didn’t.  They’ve received Pell Grants for the community college (for which I am thankful, but that I hate that we aren’t personally taking care of our own children), but now that my older one is going to a university, she needs more money that just what the Pell Grant offers.  She is applying to work at the university and she is getting a student loan.  She also has the Pell Grant and a scholarship. Hopefully, once I get a job, I will be able to give her some money, too, since I’ve not fulfilled my responsibility in seeing that money was saved for college.

I never did say anything else last night and he didn’t either.  He didn’t say anything about the car this morning and I need to find out what K thinks about the Saturn – if she can even trust him if he says he will give it to her – before I say anything else to him about the car.

Anyhow, the insanity continues…

This entry was posted in covert abuse, emotional abuse, marriage, money, passive aggressive, passive aggressive behavior, relationships and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s