If you are married to a Passive Aggressive man, you are probably co-dependent. Fact.
We are the kind of people passive aggressive men seek out to be with.
So, how do we get healthy so we won’t be involved in unhealthy relationships?
Twelve-step recovery programs are a very good way to do this. I don’t know of one geared specifically for those of us that are living with a passive aggressive person, but any of the twelve-step programs will actually work, because they are all set up basically along the same lines. I personally have attended Al-Anon, which is for friends and relatives of alcoholics, and it was a huge help. I also know there is one called CoDA – Co-Dependents Anonymous, but I have never attended it. There are quite a few other twelve-step programs, as well. Just find one! Learn from it! And if it isn’t one you are comfortable being in, there probably is another one that you would be comfortable in not too far away.
I’m a big reader, so there are some books that I’ve read that address co-dependency. One is “The Language of Letting Go,” by Melanie Beattie, which is a daily reader. The same author also wrote, “Co-dependent No More.” Two other books that are great are “Boundaries” and “Necessary Endings.” These two are by Dr. Henry Cloud. “Boundaries” has a lot of scriptural references, so if that is not your cup of tea, then you know. Even if you are not a Bible person, though, this book contains a ton of very good information and strategies. “Necessary Endings” is geared primarily toward business practices but everything that he talks about applies to personal life as well. I think this book is awesome.
If you can afford it, you could also find a therapist or counselor to talk to to help you with learning to become a better you. Possibly a clergy person could help you as well. Do not make the mistake, though, of trying to talk to someone about passive aggressive behavior and/or co-dependency who does not understand it!
Seek out the help you need! Therapists are expensive. Books are not as expensive. And twelve-step programs are almost free.
Do what you need to do to take care of yourself!!!