At the end of work, I was – yet again -dreading coming home.
I was wondering what it would be like to come home to a peaceful, loving evening, instead of a stress-filled one, wondering what it would be like coming home to a man with whom I actually had a good relationship, whom I enjoyed being with, wondering what it would be like to have a pleasant evening and then make love.
And you know what? I don’t even know what that would look like anymore. I have been so empty in this relationship for so many years that I don’t even know what a good, loving relationship would be like.
Then I started wondering if such a thing is even possible, or if it is just another fairy tale. Or maybe it is possible. But just not for me.