another home improvement (mini) saga

Our bedroom has two ceiling fans ~ one over our bed and one on the other side of the room, the “office.”

About ten days ago, the light switch on the ceiling fan in the office stopped working.  He asked me to stop by Home Depot on my way home from work and get a new switch so he could fix the light switch.  So I did.

He didn’t replace the switch.  He discovered, after all, that it did work intermittently.

Then the light switch on the fan above our bed went out.  Completely out.  So I used the switch that I had previously bought, and replaced the one above our bed last night.  He did buy wire nuts for me, since he didn’t know where the ones he thought he had were.  But when I asked about wire strippers, he just said his dad had some and next time he would ask to borrow his dad’s, but that I could use his pocket knife.  I got the switch replaced.

Tonight after work, I stopped by the store and bought another light switch and a pair of wire strippers.   After we ate, I told him that I was going to turn off the power and get the other switch replaced.  He said, oh, you should have told me so I could borrow the wire strippers from my dad.  I told him I bought my own pair.  He told me I paid too much for them.  (I don’t think so.)  Then when I showed them to him, he said his dad had a pair just like them.  (A high compliment.)  When I started to cut one of the wires (I knew exactly what I was doing), he told me I was doing it wrong and wanted to look at, so I let him.  He ended up telling me to go ahead and he went to take a shower.  I got that switch replaced.

He didn’t replace the first switch when he said he would.  It seemed like he wasn’t that interested in me having the right tools to use.  And then, he didn’t like the way I was doing it.  Of course, all this was done in a very mild mannered way.  He has a very calm personality.

In honesty, I do need to add that I do enjoy fixing things.  I do like doing home improvement projects.

But there is also part of me that really would like to be taken care of.  That I wouldn’t always be the errand boy, that I wouldn’t always be the fix-it man.

On another note:  tonight he was excited because he got to drive his dad’s truck!  His dad doesn’t let him drive the truck, but this afternoon he got to!  And that was a big deal to him.  I think maybe he has some issues to address.

Well, I have to go wash dishes now.

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This entry was posted in covert abuse, emotional abuse, marriage, passive aggressive, passive aggressive behavior, relationships and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to another home improvement (mini) saga

  1. K says:

    They’re stuck at around 4 years old, maturity wise, I think. What attracts us when we’re young is the laid back, free thinking personality, and we end up with a grown up manchild. Mine threw fits because his foot spa wasn’t working and has literally spent HOURS tracking down just the the right one. Chores be damned. That’s what I’m here for. They only care about what they want to do, want want want. I’m sick of it.

    • Yes, I think 4 years old is about it. He just wants to play with his toys and his friends and let me be responsible. I don’t really want that responsibility so much anymore!!! I think it should be a team effort! If he wants a mommy and a daddy to look after him and the household responsibilities, maybe he should go back and live with his parents!!!

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