I was on the local news this evening. Another lady and I were being interviewed about Go Red For Women and that is an important message to get out! It was a good opportunity to spread the word about women’s heart health.
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I looked so fat.
I’ve been wanting to do a post about my weight and I guess now is the time.
I need to lose thirty pounds. And it shows.
I use food to stuff my emotions instead of expressing them. I use food to comfort myself since I feel I have no other comfort. I’ve said that chocolate is my lover, since I don’t actually have a lover.
I eat too much. And I have a few other things going against me, too. One is genetics. Another is the beginning of the hormone changes that come with my age. And I KNOW stress plays a factor in my weight.
And I have a round face anyway.
I also have breasts. And a woman with larger breasts is going to look larger overall than a woman of the same size with smaller breasts. I’m a D cup, so I’m not massive, but I’m also not tiny.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not complaining about my breasts. I have great breasts. I’m just saying, they add a little bulk.
Another thing is the shirt I wore. I only have one red shirt and while it is not terrible, it is not the most flattering style on me. (I wore red for Go Red For Women.) I have a shorter neck and this was a shirt with a collar. Not the best choice for a shorter neck. Also it has two pleated pockets on the front, and while cute, they do add more instead of slimming.
I will be attending a huge Go Red event next month and I wish I had something new and red and flattering to wear. I also wish I weighed less. It’s still four weeks away so maybe I can find something different to wear. (I did wear this shirt to another Go Red event – as if anyone is even going to remember.) And maybe I can lose a couple pounds between now and then, too.
Anyhow, my weight often discourages me. And, you know, this morning, when I was dressed to go to the interview (it was taped this morning), I looked in the mirror and was thinking that I was looking a little better, that maybe those hours at the gym were helping a little.
Guess not yet. I guess I still eat way too much (I think I am going to start just eating applesauce for dinner) and I don’t do enough cardio. I do cardio at home, usually running/walking, but often things get too busy and too stressful at home and I don’t go out and run like I need to. So that has to change, too. I have to run, regardless.
I’ve been battling my weight since I was about fifteen. Isn’t it about time to just address the emotional stuff tied to this and be done with it already?