lovely evening

As you know from my previous post, he wasn’t here last night.


My daughter was in her car, talking to her sister, while I ate my soup and blogged.

(You know, Thursday night I made stew to cook in the crock pot all day Friday so dinner would be ready when I got home Friday evening.  He saw me making the stew.  He could have said, oh, I won’t be home for dinner tomorrow night. ~ Or not.)

About the time I finished eating and blogging, my daughter came in from talking to her sister.

And we had a lovely evening.

She got some soup to eat and we actually were sitting down together at the dining room table, free to talk with each other.  This, like, never happens!

After she finished eating, she got her box full of all the things she had made in ceramics class this semester.  She took them out of the box, one at at time, and showed them to me and told me about them.

Eventually, her ceramic pieces were all spread out on the dining room table.  We put tea lights in a few of them and we put water and floating candles in a few of them.  The light from the candles would reflect in the glaze of the various dishes.  It was lovely.

It was so nice to spend the evening with her.  And when we needed to go to bed, I felt so sad thinking about all the evenings that I have missed that could have spent with her if we weren’t trying to hide from and placate my passive aggressive husband.

I thoroughly enjoyed have the bed and the bedroom and the bathroom to myself.  It felt, oh, I don’t know, luxurious?   He’ll probably be home soon, but I sure did enjoy my respite.

This entry was posted in covert abuse, divorce, emotional abuse, family, marriage, passive aggressive, passive aggressive behavior, relationships and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to lovely evening

  1. And life could be like this all the time. Use the memory of this lovely evening to give you strength x

  2. ina says:

    Why are you putting up with the “crazy making” husband? I have read that by not standing up to these passive aggressives, we inadvertently “enable” them and perpetuate their dysfunctional behavior. It is not good for you, it is not good for your child and it is not helping your husband. Just a thought. I wish I knew what I know now, I would not have stayed for 36 years married to a crazy maker and maybe he would have done something with his “issues.”

  3. tiredofitall says:

    Ina, I beg to differ… only from my experience and everyone’s has probably experienced this differently but in my case this is it. I have “stood up” to my PA only to “pay” for it in some other way. The other thing too, they are so good at “turning the tables” on you that you are shouting when a simple “sorry dear, I don’t agree” turned into a full blown war of words, yells and accusations. They find ways to “cope” and they are like “chameleons” interchanging their reactions and ways of dealing with a “perceived” confrontation even if it’s a simple and gentle “I beg to differ”… if others have more precise examples by all means, share them, I don’t want to share too much in case my PAH reads this…

  4. wifeofpa says:

    it’s a good feeling to hold on to my dear.

  5. It is so nice when they are not around. When mine isn’t for whatever reason we enjoy it so much more and I too think how much I am missing out with my kids because of him. When he is home I stay in my room and let him and the kids do whatever. I don’t want to be around him I don’t want to talk to him or even look at him most the time. I don’t even like for him to be in the same house with me.

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