Passive Aggressive Man (the superhero)

mourning light found this one:

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This entry was posted in covert abuse, emotional abuse, marriage, passive aggressive, passive aggressive behavior, relationships and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to Passive Aggressive Man (the superhero)

  1. mourninglight says:

    I first saw this last year I think, but every now and then I find it and watch it because it reminds me that some people out there actually recognize what p.a. is, and I’m not alone.

  2. Teresa says:

    Rough night tonight….at this point I HATE all PA men!!

  3. Teresa says:

    My PA husband is never going to change. I always hope and pray. But I know he won’t. It’s as simple as that. And what’s so hard is that when he’s not being PA. We have fun. He’s not a mean PA, he likes to spend money on me, he even goes shopping with me to the mall and doesn’t seem to mind going…we go out to eat, etc….
    But underneath all of that. I do wonder..How much of that is to control me? To “keep me happy” so that I don’t make a fuss? To keep me off balance?
    I don’t want to be a suspicious wife all the time…looking at EVERYTHING as PA behavior…BUT!!??
    He does tell me “Who spoils you, huh??” Or “I always let you shop and buy whatever you want, don’t I?” And now as I’m learning more and more about the PA man….it scares me because I really think he’s manipulating me!!
    Am I being to sensitive? Is this just the “nice” side that so many PAs seem to have?? Thoughts?? Anyone??
    I’m really confused….when I’m “good Teresa” he’s happy…but when I realize how lonely I truly am, and try to talk to him, he accuses me of not appreciating how hard he works. And that he’s doing his “job” keeping a roof over our heads! I told him that might be true, but that roof over my head is crushing the life out of me!!
    Everyday when he comes home, he falls asleep on the couch. He does get up early, around 5:15am….and gets home around 4:30…..I don’t mind, I know he has to be exhausted….but his 15 minute power naps are usually 1 1/2 to 3 hrs long, then he’s in bad by 10pm!
    Tonight he got home at 6:30 and was asleep by 7, then he woke up at 9….first thing he said to me, what he ALWAYS says to me, “Why did you let me sleep so long?”
    Did ya get that YOU in there, BTW? Like its MY fault?? I’ve started responding by saying” It’s not my responsibility to wake you up…set an alarm!”

    It scares me how crazy this stuff is! I feel so lonely. No one understands! My PAH is such a nice guy….everyone loves him…which I KNOW is very common with PAs…and that makes me feel like CRAP…because I don’t seem very nice!
    Years ago I even questioned my PAH about why he loves me….because I didn’t feel I was a very nice, lovable person…now I know WHY I felt that way! He made me feel that way because I was the one losing my temper….all while he stayed calm, enjoying my anger!
    Man….what a sick life I’m living.

    Sorry for the rant.

  4. mourninglight says:

    I’ve thought that because he is such a nice guy, and can be so charming, funny, smart, helpful etc. etc. that it’s created a sort of cognitive dissonance for me.

    • Yes, I run into that a lot too. My husband can be very nice and funny and smart and helpful … and then it makes me doubt all over again. It’s crazy-making!!!!! Occasionally I will go back and read my blog for reassurance about the reality of my marriage. I remind myself, too, that when push comes to shove, he is simply not there for me.

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