He’s been doing something recently that really bugs me. He hangs around me. If I’m in the kitchen, he hangs around the kitchen and talks. If I’m in the bedroom, he comes in the bedroom and stands around and talks. And he keeps asking me to go places with him.
This is going to be a little hard to explain. Yes, for years and years (and years), I wanted him to spend more time with me. And he wouldn’t.
Then, late last summer, I asked him to move out. Of course, he wouldn’t. So now, he is just always there.
It seems that whatever I want, he does the opposite.
And the thing about him hanging around is that even though he is there, and usually talking to me, it still feels like I don’t really matter that much. He’s just talking about himself. I might as well be anybody. It’s hard to explain.
When he does ask me something about my day, and I answer him, then he has something negative to say about whatever I said.
And sometimes he’s there, in the same room, but obviously not there. As in, “I am here but I am not going to interact with you even though you are the only other person here.” It’s kind of weird. It’s not like companionable silence; it’s uncomfortable somehow. I don’t know if I am making any sense.
For years I have felt tense around him. I never knew what he was going to say, if he was going to be pleasant or passive aggressive. Now I am even more tense, because honestly I don’t care what he says, I just want him to leave me alone.
It’s almost like being around a child who doesn’t understand personal space, who doesn’t understand that maybe the whole world doesn’t revolve around them, who doesn’t understand that maybe somebody else has other interests as well. I almost feel sorry for him.
I don’t know; maybe by hanging around and talking, he thinks that he is working on the relationship. Maybe if the “conversations” were different. Maybe if it was more than just the weather, the view where he was working, the person that he saw who know somebody or was related to somebody.